I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Randomize
