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• (310): View more from California

  what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?

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• (205): View more from Alabama

  why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (419): View more from Ohio

  More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.

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• (859): View more from Kentucky

  Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"

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  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

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• (307): View more from Wyoming

  She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.

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• (858): View more from California

  Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night

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• (765): View more from Indiana

  My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Yeah, I liked it.

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".

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