if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
