ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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