lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
