I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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