do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Randomize
