Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
