Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
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