You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Randomize
