Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
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