Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Randomize
