Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
