Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(206): View more from Washington

I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.

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(208): View more from Idaho

just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.

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(954): View more from Florida

I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(480): View more from Arizona

I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.

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(44): View more from United Kingdom

You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.

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(907): View more from Alaska

his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord

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(408): View more from California

I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.

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(806): View more from Texas

My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?

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