she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
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