i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
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