the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
