So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
