I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
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