its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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