Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
