He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
