your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Randomize
