Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize