Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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