I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
