All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
As shirtless as possible
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
