I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Let's get the cat blown out
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
