Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
that is very illegal...i love you.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
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