drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Plan B is the new Plan A
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
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