i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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