i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
