I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
