OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
