I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
