it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
I'm having to shit out rocks
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
