So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
