If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize