The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
