I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
