Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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