It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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