U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
