what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
It's shark week go big or go home
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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