I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
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