I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Randomize