I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
