You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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