So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Randomize
