I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
