If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Randomize
